Is it my fault??

maybe if i close eyes I won’t see anymore
maybe if i close my heart I won’t feel anymore

but neither of it works

i closed my eyes and i saw you
clearly as if you never left
they say “never lose that light from you eyes”
that’s why i kept your vision inside my eyes because you were my light
or maybe you were just the shadow making them dark and i should push you away
but i was afraid to do one
i closed my eyes and there you were

i tried to close my heart
but oh god how could i never realize it was broken
how can i close something that’s down in pieces bleeding 
or even worse i found my soul like that too
and my veins
my mind
i lost my mind when you shut down the door so hard when you left

maybe if i close eyes I won’t see anymore
maybe if i close my heart I won’t feel anymore

but neither of it worked
nothing ever works in this pain....